For today’s man, especially one with a bit of Scottish blood coursing through his veins, the lure of the man-dress is undeniable. And for those of us who have experienced the freedom, flexibility, and raw sexual power of the kilt firsthand… well, ’nuff said.
But for those who haven’t yet crossed over, I know you’re secretly wondering, What is that like? Could I pull that off? Would I be more of a man, or less? As your certified masculinity expert, I’m here to assure you there is nothing more manly than donning a kilt. In fact, I would submit that it’s the ultimate expression of maleness. So if you’ve ever thought of wrapping those slim hips in your very own dress, fellow macho man, there’s no time like the present.
(And, by the way, if you’re interested in moving beyond the traditional wool/tartan vibe, check out Utilikilts at utilikilts.com — great site, great product and great mock-u-mercials.)
So, what does all this have to do with men’s shoes?
The reason I bring up the kilt thing is that while kilt-wearers will happily tell you how great their kiwis feel set loose under the drapery, they won’t tell you what to wear on your feet when you’re flaunting your manly self. That, apparently, is up to you. So, with kilt season upon us, I thought I’d offer a little guidance on picking the right footwear to accompany your latest fashion statement.
I recently started my own quest for a new pair of kicks to go with my Original Utilikilt. As you know from a previous column, I’m partial to boots, and that still applies (maybe even more) when I’m looking for a kickass komplement for the kilt. After hours of online browsing, I selected three options — two Timberland models (the Urban and the Earthkeepers) from Zappos and a pair of genuine Australian Blundstones (the 490 in black) that I picked up from Amazon. I got everything in two sizes — just to make perfectly sure — and had them all delivered to the house, where my bonnie, long-suffering wife tolerated the pile of boxes for two obsessive weeks of try-ons and photos.
God bless her.
But this time, rather than telling you what I finally picked, how about you tell me what you like? For your reference, I’ve included a photo of the boots, as well as some photos of a strong-legged, handsomer-than-average model. The differences among the footwear selections are subtle, but as any good shoe-hound knows, God himself is in the details. Once you’ve had a chance to check out the options, send me a note at firstname.lastname@example.org, and let me know what you think works best. I’ll let you know my choice in the next column.
In the meantime, Godspeed and good shoe-hunting (and skirt-chasing).
— Burke Andrews